But would they find them in there, along with the lippy, old bus tickets, loose change, cuddly key-ring, compact, mobile phone, brolly, keys, diary, tissues, chewing gum…

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And this man of the cloth is really saddended, isn’t he?

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A headline that was surely a cry from the heart:

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She was only the grocer’s daughter but:

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And finally, a cut-out-and-keep headline, for all those special occasions:

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See our previous headlines…

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If you’ve seen a headline or a news report – good, bad or bizarre – that you think deserves a wider audience, fax it to us, marked for the attention of Patrick Astill, on 0116 227 3147.

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