A weekly column reproduced from the Bristol Evening Post

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It hasn’t taken NuLabour long to get into its second term stride, has it?

It’s only two weeks since the election and Mr Blah has already sorted himself out two pay rises.

Expect such arrogance to continue as Tony’s control freaks seek to take hold of every aspect of our lives. Watch out especially for Tessa Jowell, Minister for Culture, Media and Sport, who would like to be called “Minister for Free Time”. Expect lots more TV adverts telling you that lying on a beach at midday may result in sunburn and how to wash your hands properly.

Up and down the country, party apparatchiks are already adopting the Nanny State mentality so beloved by Mr Blah. Take Norwich City Council, for instance, which has decided to cut down an avenue of 20 horse chestnut trees on the spurious grounds of “public safety.”

Apparently, and steel yourself for this, children throw sticks into the trees to bring down conkers. And those sticks might come back down to land on a child’s head. Right.

Personally, I can’t recall walking down a street in September past small heaps of unconscious children, but perhaps I’ve led a sheltered life. Nanny knows best, I’m sure.

They’ll be banning bouncy castles next. Oh, sorry, they already have.

I have attended two one-day cricket internationals in the past week or so.

In both cases, a good day out was spoilt by the ludicrous antics of a small minority who ran onto the pitch and ruined the match.

So why can’t they lock the England team in the dressing room?

Given the general malaise infecting sport in this country in recent days, it only seems fitting that our politicians should match England’s on-the-pitch ineptitude with an off-the-pitch appointment as bewildering as that which made Alec Stewart captain.

I am talking here of our new Sports Minister, Richard Caborn, who despite claiming to be a Sheffield United fan, doesn’t seem to know very much about sport. Or perhaps that’s why.

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