Entries for our festive funnies – win a box of luxury chocolates or HoldTheFrontPage seaside rock – close at 3pm today (Thursday), so you have just hours left to e-mail us your joke and be in with a chance of a prize.

Robert Lloyd, from Swansea, sent this contribution:

Good King Wenceslas, very irate, rings Pizza Hut -“Don’t bother me with the usual nonsense about do I want Four Seasons topping -I want mine Deep’an’crisp’an’even”(Try singing the tune to go with it!)

And Sarah Lay, from Derby, went for a Star Wars theme:

‘So Luke Skywalker is facing Darth Vader in a final battle.
Light sabres are swishing and both sides of the force are strong.
Eventually, they pause as Darth calls: “Luke! Luke! I have something to tell you”.
Luke swipes at him and says: “I have no interest in your words”.
Darth stands firm as the young Jedi continues to fight him: “But Luke…I know what you’ve got for Christmas”.
Luke is visably shocked and while managing to keep up the defence shouts: “It’s not true!”.
Darth lets out his sub-human laugh and repeats: “I know what you’ve got for Christmas, Luke”.
Finally, as the fight pauses, Luke’s curiosity gets the better of him and he asks: “But how?”.
Darth takes several hollow breathes, leans close to Luke and exclaims: “I know what you’ve got for Christmas because I’ve felt your presents.” ‘

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